Part I: Lag Ba'omer
This morning I am writing with a heavy heart after the tragedy in Meron last night. As usual I am finishing this post at the last minute. The idea I had decided to begin with last night is that Lag Ba’omer is not a typical celebration. It marks the cessation of a really horrible tragedy, the death of 24,000 of Rabbi Akiva’s students. It is also the yahrzeit of Rabbi Shimon Bar Yochai. It seems a strange reason to celebrate. Rav Schorr’s beautiful comments on the complexity of this particular date seem all the more meaningful this morning.
Rav Schorr points out that Lag Ba’Omer means that we have reached the final third of the Omer. On the one hand, this means that we are getting closer in time to Shavout, which is a very joyous thing. We are finally close enough that the light of Shavout is able to radiate outward towards us, and we can feel its impact. We can begin in earnest to take on the avodah of preparing for Shavout and strengthening our connection to the Torah. This pattern was set up during our first year as a nation. One of the preconditions for receiving the Torah the first time was eating the manna. And Lag Ba’omer is the day when, after several days without food, the manna started to fall, and fed our entire nation. Lag Ba’omer is the time to began to prepare our bodies in earnest for the giving of the Torah.
On the other hand, Rav Schorr points out another feeling that might come with the realization that the omer is almost over. We may feel that we haven’t grown as we meant to in these first 33 days. We may feel more disconnected than connected. And there is the possibility that instead of excitement, we could feel disappointment or despair. The message of Rabbi Akiva on Lag Ba’omer is that we can always move forward. Rabbi Akiva lost 24,000 students. It was an unspeakable tragedy. Who wouldn’t have understood if he would have chosen to give up? Instead, he rebuilt with only five students. One of those five students, of course, was Rabbi Shimon Bar Yochai. We celebrate the hillula of Rabbi Shimon Bar Yochai, the anniversary of the day of his death, because that was the day of the greatest light, the day he gave over the deepest secrets of the kabbalah. The Torah of Rabbi Akiva’s remaining five students, and of Rabbi Shimon Bar Yochai in particular, has been enough to sustain us through the long galut.
Lag Ba’Omer is the day that marks the tragedies that can happen to us, but also the power Hashem gives us to rebuild from those tragedies. It is a day that recognizes that we are complex beings in a complex world. Most of all, it is the day that tells us, in preparation for Shavout, that we have the ability to strengthen our connection to the Torah even if we don’t feel that connected yet. In this week’s parsha (Vayikra 23:16) we read: “until the day after the 7th Shabbat, you shall count 50 days.” On this, the Kotzker Rebbe taught that even if all 49 days of the sefira have passed, a person is still able, in the one moment he has left, to create light that is equivalent to the avodah of all 50 days.
Part II: Connecting to the Light
Lag Ba’omer is a great time to explore our inner light. Rav Schorr’s amazingly deep comments on this week’s parsha allow us to begin to get a sense of what this might mean in action. His Torah is a bit abstract in the beginning. Please stick with me for a moment, I think it’s worth it.
Rav Schorr begins by calling our attention to the Midrash Rabbah’s comments on the double language of the first pasuk in this week’s parsha, “Say to the Kohanim, B’nei Aharon, and say to them, do not become impure.” The Midrash tells us that, unlike the angels, when we receive a mitzvah we need two separate ma’amarot, two sayings. Apparently, the need for two ma’amarot is worked into our essence. But what are they, and what does this tell us about ourselves?
Rav Schorr explains that there are actually two parts of every mitzvah we receive. Each mitzvah has both a hidden, closed ma’amar, and a revealed ma’amar. The hidden ma’amar is the actual word of Hashem that expresses the command. When Hashem speaks, reality is created. Those words last through time. Our spiritual reality continues to be created through these words, even if we are not aware of it. The revealed ma’amar, on the other hand, is the instruction that we understand from the word of Hashem.
For example, when Hashem commanded the Kohanim “you shall not become tameh for a (deceased) person among your people,” something changed in the spiritual reality of the kohanim. Deep within their essential self, a separation from tumah was created. This is the effect of the hidden ma’amar. At the same time, the kohanim were given a command to not become tamei, impure. This open ma’amar is a warning to guard the spiritual reality expressed by the closed ma’amar.
This is the truth of every mitzvah. The command to eat certain sacred foods only in Jerusalem is expressed in the Torah as “lo tuchal l’echol b’sharecha (Devarim 12:17).” The literal meaning of these words is, “you are not able to eat it in your gates.” The commandments, positive and negative, create our internal spiritual reality. We have 248 internal spiritual limbs created by the 248 positive commandments, and 365 spiritual ligaments created by the negative commandments. In the world of truth, this is our reality. We cannot do that which is forbidden by the Torah. If we were angels, we would only need one ma’amar, and we would always act according to the reality created by that ma’amar.
We are not, however, angels. We are people created in the world of bechira, free choice. Hashem gave us the astounding ability to go against the inner truth of who we are. Chazal tell us (Menachot 29b:) that anyone who wants to leave his inner world can leave. This is why there is a second aspect to every mitzvah. The spoken words of the mitzvah are the open ma’amar. They are the words that warn us to guard our own spiritual reality, even if we are disconnected to it, by following the actions of the mitzvah.
The Gra tells us that this is one of the deeper meanings of the bracha we make before every mitzvah: “asher kidishanu bmitzvotav v’tzivanu, Who made us kadosh with His mitzvot and commanded us.” The kedusha of the mitzvah is the essence of the mitzvah that comes down deep into the soul of the person from a very high place. This gives us our inner holiness. Along with this, Hashem also gave us a command. These are the actions that allow us to safeguard our spiritual reality.
We can understand this more deeply by looking at the mitzvah of loving our fellow Jew. How is it that we can be commanded to love? Because the closed ma’amar of this mitzvah creates within us a deep and real love for others. We have that spiritual treasure inside. The positive commandment to love every Jew is the command to bring that force of love out into reality, through our interactions with our neighbors.
Each mitzvah is another aspect of connecting to the light within ourselves. May we be blessed as individuals and as a nation to find that inner light.
May all those inured physically and emotionally experience a complete and total healing.
L’ilui nishamat all the beautiful souls who were tragically niftar in Meron.